Society dictates that selfishness is bad, despite the fact it is a natural drive. Selfishness to the point of doing harm to others is bad, but some selfishness can be good.
Like taking what I want from my partner this past Tuesday night.
During the day on Tuesday, I asked SwingBot about how to communicate clearly, dominantly, but in a way that is still considerate to him when I want him to use him as a sexual submissive. An e-mailed agenda or play date marked on the calendar could work for advance planning, but not so much when the mood strikes. He mentioned something that we discussed before, but I forgot and failed to fully appreciate: collaring.
Tuesday evening went by, and I got distracted and preoccupied, never collaring him before bedtime, despite having desires that I wanted to fulfill. As I came to bed, part of me felt it was late and it would be inconsiderate for me to demand anything. That is the side of me that normally wins, and the side that keeps me dragging my heels. No! I had something that I wanted, and I was going to take it! I flipped the blankets off of him and applied the blue collar (he looks great in blue).
For what I wanted, he did not need to prepare, but I did. I stripped and rinsed myself, to make sure that all was squeaky-clean, and straddled his face upon my return. His tongue tantalized, teased, and pleased simultaneously. I could have stayed that way for a while, but I had more on my mind. I turned around so that his mouth still had access to my cunt, while my mouth could take in his cock.
We continued mutual oral on each other until I needed to ride him, which I did in Cowgirl, after turning around once again. Since he is taller than I am, I had difficulty staying in the angle that felt most satisfying while also reaching to hold his throat. Once again, being selfish pays; we adjusted the bed so that his neck was conveniently within my reach.
Upon finishing, we snuggled together for a while, before rolling into our preferred positions for sleep.
It is an ongoing project, but I am going to concentrate more on communicating (and taking) what I want, when it comes to me, without so frequently saying, “No, maybe now’s not a good time…” I think that we will both enjoy the increased amount of activity that reduced hesitation will bring.