On a sex discussion site, someone asked, “Can men and women be friends without a sexual agenda?”
To which I respond, “Really?” with disbelieving exasperation.
Even better, some women actually responded with answers along the lines of, “Every man I have ever befriended/known has wanted me sexually.”
To which I respond, “Really,” with disbelieving coolness.
I admit that I have not met every woman on the planet. However, I have yet to meet one for whom every man, without exception, becomes enamored… for whom every man lusts… to whom every man attempts friendship in hopes of having his way with her.
Even I, so obsessed with sex that I blog about it, frequent sex forums, read other sex blogs, masturbate regularly, and have sex with two men, am able to have friendly non-sexual relationships with people. And I am not arrogant enough to believe that all men — or even many men — who are nice to me act that way in hopes of jumping my bones.
I figure that these women who are so greatly desired by all their male friends or associates (why, no, I did not type that without smirking) could be reasonably explained by one of the following:
1. They really are such amazing beings of desirability that they overcome all men’s personal preferences and self-control. Truly, all men want to have sex with these goddesses.
2. They only notice and/or befriend men who make overt attempts at friendship, and the men who make such attempts generally are motivated by physical attraction. This population is self-selecting.
* 2a. Their attitudes and/or behaviors are off-putting enough that the only men likely to attempt friendship are those with a sexual agenda.
* 2b. They only are friendly with men that they consider attractive and/or who make them feel attractive, only encouraging friendship with potential sexual prospects.
3. For whatever reason, they only observe men who are sexually interested in them. All men who are not interested “do not count.”
4. They have some seriously inflated egos and hear “Good morning” as a sexual proposition.
5. They are lying.
Which reason do you think is likeliest? Do you have one that I overlooked?