Swinging… There Are Protocols?

*Note: These posts are weekly, often composed in advance, and so may not always reflect events in real time. SwingBot does post about events as they happen. Consequently, there may be discrepancies in the stages of our stories.*

After years of off-and-on discussion about finding other sexual partners for us to share, SwingBot and I finally started an active search. Very quickly, we got our first real candidate. I found a humorous and intelligent profile belonging to a humorous and intelligent bisexual man. He and we (primarily SwingBot, at first) were soon exchanging messages, chatting, and planning a meet-and-greet-no-sex first date.

So, we went on the first date. The men were dressed remarkably similarly in relaxed trousers and button-down short-sleeved casual-nice shirts. Honestly, I asked them whether they coordinated their outfits. I could have done a lot better with my outfit; I wore nice shorts but ruined the effect with an aged tee-shirt that has pit stains from two decades of sweat and deodorant. Classy; apparently someone forgot how to make a good first impression.

We met at a restaurant of the man’s suggestion and had dinner. Due to the public setting, conversation stayed within publicly acceptable boundaries. “Watch any good movies?” Detailed discussion of movie interests, which migrated to TV shows and actors. “Where did you grow up?” A conversation about where we grew up, moving to the area, which migrated to the military, which migrated to job experiences. A little information about his current family situation and ours. A little discussion of gaming and the gaming culture. Then he got up and left.

“Did he bail?” “No, his keys are still here.” “So, what now?” He returned and we learned that we were supposed to discuss whether we wanted to move forward. From not even bringing up sex at all to “So, how about it?” was an abrupt conversation switch. While I am pretty sure neither of us actually shouted, “Woah, nelly!” I think that our reactions were about that graceful. With much awkwardness on our part and much patience on his, we parted ways for the night.